“Yes, I already had suicidal thoughts during this difficult period of my life. And it was the music that saved me from acting. But because I was honest about these things, because I talked about it publicly, I can no longer have life insurance!”, says the interpreter to Last resort And Destroyed home in an interview at BLVD 102.1’s premises on Monday a few hours before a conference and an acoustic performance at Salle Lebourgneuf with his guitarist Jerry Horton.
“The only times I felt at peace were when I was in my creative process. When I left the studio, it became very difficult. I’ve managed to stay sober since then, but my real healing began when I approached me God. My sobriety inspired me to immerse myself in prayer,” continues Shaddix, whose show and accompanying conference are presented in partnership with the Quebec Suicide Prevention Center.
“I asked God for help and God showed up through different people I met. Since then I have never looked back. This is now my life insurance!”
— Jacoby Shaddix, singer for Papa Roach
meet fans
“Our music has always had a lot to do with mental health. Last resort, It was a cry for help, and I think it’s good that today people talk more about mental health. That’s also why I really like presenting these shows where I also chat with the public. And with an acoustic performance, it lends itself very well. I want to let people know that there is help. I know because, unfortunately, I’ve found myself here more often than I care to admit,” says the tattooed singer, who has stopped in New York, Philadelphia and Washington and will attend Canadian Music Week next week from Toronto.
Shaddix also appreciates every second of these meetings with fans. “These are powerful moments when we realize that our music can also be a source of hope in darker times. We didn’t necessarily think of that when we started making music, but it’s a very beautiful byproduct,” he illustrates. .
The composition of the album The connection in 2012, from which the successes are drawn Still swinging, Where did the angels go? And Leader of the broken hearts, also represents Shaddix at his lowest, which his sidekick Horton also recognizes. “Even though we didn’t see his darkest times that much, we knew it was hard for him. When I was there, I tried to be there for him,” confides the musician. “I was drinking … a lot … I was separated from my wife and she was thinking about filing for divorce. I felt a lot of guilt and shame because of all that,” Shaddix admits, indicating that it was during this period that he thought about ending it.
“My moral compass was completely out of whack… When I got closer to God, it was these moral guidelines that helped me. But God, you have to find it in your own way, you can’t have it imposed on you, ” he continues and adds that he now tries to improve every day and give himself goals to achieve.
Ups and downs
As a group, Papa Roach also had its ups and downs before turning around. “We’re one of the last bands to sign one of these crazy, high-paying record deals,” Shaddix says of the Dreamworks label deal that led to the album’s release. Infest in 2000.
“We sold a lot of CDs, but when (the music industry) collapsed, it was scary. We saw record label presidents get fired, employees lose their jobs, and the industry was no longer a shadow of what it used to be.”
— Jacoby Shaddix, on the crushing of the record industry
“For us it was the same. We started from very low, we climbed very high, we came back very low. But luckily we are doing great fansmaybe a little less than before, of course, but we can still make a living from our music, and for six or seven years it has started to rise again,” continues the singer, who states that the group has launched his latest album, Ego Tripin 2022 completely independently on his own label New Noize Records.
“And so will the next one. We’re freer, more creative that way if there’s less people running the economy… We fought all our lives to have record deals, and that was the right business model until it’s no more,” summarizes Shaddix, adding that his group will probably release a new song in September, along with announcing a new tour and perhaps a new album for 2025. “There will be a lot of very cool announcements coming in the fall!” , he concludes.
